Solitude

The darkness rush from the east. I am here, waiting for the stars come out of hiding. I am here, alone. Without someone to hold. Without someone who can break the silence of the night. I let my hair straggling on my shoulders, knowing that no one that i need to impress. I inhale, for several times. Just to make sure that I'm alive. I'm still here, after passing through difficult times. I'm alive. Or am I?

In the morning I woke up, I felt something is missing. I couldn't see it, but I felt it. What did I lose? My heart? It's been missing since an Adam took it and don't return it. My faith? It's not missing, it's tottering. When the sun kissed my eyes, I realized what's been missing. My soul.

Now everything looks opaque. No more walking in the park with you. No more home-made cooking that usually through my throat. No more tweeting about the mean girls. It's all gone. No, wait! Everything's stay. I am the one who's gone. I am the ghost, all the time. Everyone is avoiding me. I saw fears in their eyes whenever the look at me. I am no longer be needed. And what's not important need to be thrown away.

I am going. Somewhere far away. Far away from the reality. Far away from the pain, the laugh, and love. Seeking for my inner peace. I thought in this journey i will never feel lonely anymore.

I was wrong.